I'm blogging now. I don't really know why. It seems to make you feel a little bit better, so I think I need to give it a shot.

I have no idea what's going on. And I have no idea where I'm going to live if this falls through. And it is so close to falling through. I don't have enough, I don't have what we need. I feel so horrible right now. I feel like I'm a failure somehow. I've failed. I've failed you. I'm crying right now because of this. This is ridiculous.

I know what your mother thinks of me. I don't know how wrong she is anymore. I'm starting to feel the same. It's not that I'm not trying, but if I still can't pull through does that make me any better for it? I don't know anymore.

It hurts so bad that I can't make all of this work for you. I'd like to build you a palace for you to live in, with everything you could ever want. I would give you everything there was to give, if I could have it in the first place. And because I don't have it to give to you, I feel like I've failed. I feel like I'm still failing, and I feel like I'm always going to. I can't take this.

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know!!!!!!!

What am I supposed to do? What if I don't find work? What if they cut me off completely?

This isn't good.

I was excited as fuck when he said he was leaving, and moved off to Tim's. Ever since he pussed out and moved back, she's gotten even worse. I hate that woman, goddamn it. Stop making her talk to me. I don't fucking care if you're getting married.

They're leaving!!

Oh thank you to whatever benevolent deity chose to act this time!

The rage I felt and then POOF, solved before I needed to act.

Well, good riddance. You shall not be missed. 

Oh and you... yeah you. I know you're there...

I've decided to let things be. I'm fairly sure you're not the jerk I once thought you were, and even if you were, I feel that I have little need to worry much. She's a big girl and can handle herself, so I think things are fine without my involvement.

So no, I don't hate you. I may even be able to get along with you at some point. We'll see


Time will tell. 

I don't even know what to write in this thing.

My life doesn't seem overly interesting... at least not the parts I'd talk about.

She's mine, and staying mine. How lucky am I?

Random thought: Shave tonight before you sleep... don't wanna be scruffy no mores.

COGI TO, ERGO NOM

Yeah, that's what I thought.